Body Shaming: It Isn't About You

Body shaming. Who hasn't experienced it? It just doesn't seem to matter how beautiful, or slim, or curvy, or tall, or short you actually are, you've probably had a back-handed compliment followed by a snippy remark. But that's just the point isn't it? It doesn't matter what you actually look like because it isn't really about you. It's about the insecurity of the person dealing what they believe to be a blow to your self-esteem. 

I wish I'd realized it sooner. That it never was about me. I'd started to believe many years ago that it was about jealousy. That's only partially true. Presently, I think that jealousy is a very obvious by-product of insecurity. If someone is not comfortable in their own skin, the go-to seems to be wondering why you should feel comfortable in yours. 

Each one of us has a way of having a dialogue with our selves. An inner voice. How you speak to yourself will inevitably become how you speak to others. Knowing this, I find it a little easier to react with compassion to those who are readily willing to share their opinion about how I look. I feel very sad for someone who needs to remark about my size and stature. I'd hate to hear their deepest opinion of themselves. It's sad, really. Because there is something beautiful and unique about everyone. The differences should be celebrated.

Be kind. Be kind to yourself, be kind to others. It doesn't have to be difficult. Don't be the random woman at the gym when I was 21: "Oh, you're so cute and little! Just wait until you have kids!" Ha! I'd already had my first child. Don't be the former co-worker: "You're dainty. Just understand: we love you, but we hate you."

It was never about me. It is never about you.  As for me, I'm quite comfortable in my own skin. I hope you are, too!